A boundless Moment
by AshLiz
Summary: Kate reveals a long kept secret to Castle. Now it's time to face the consequences no matter how unjust.
1. A time to talk

Here's a little something I have been playing around with. I hope you enjoy! Once again I own nothing Castle and it's characters don't belong to me.

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He halted in the wind, and - what was that Far in the maples, pale, but not a ghost? He stood there bringing March against his thought, And yet too ready to believe the most.  
"Oh, that's the Paradise-in-bloom," I said; And truly it was fair enough for flowers had we but in us to assume in march Such white luxuriance of May for ours.  
We stood a moment so in a strange world, Myself as one his own pretense deceives; And then I said the truth (and we moved on). A young beech clinging to its last year's leaves.

Robert Frost

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This case had taken a toll on Kate, not just physically but emotionally as well. It involved a little girl. Those were always the hardest. A little girl had been killed and Beckett had run herself ragged trying to find the killer. That little girl had reminded herself so much of her own little one.

Yes, Kate Beckett has a daughter. She always felt slightly guilty for not telling Castle. But she didn't want all this unwanted attention brought upon her, especially after the bombing of her apartment. She didn't want her daughter to be all in the spot light.

But still, she felt bad. So due to a mixture of guilt and all these other emotions swirling through her from this case she found herself standing outside Castle's apartment.

She tentatively knocks at the loft door. A few moments later the door swings open to reveal Castle wearing jeans and a regular shirt. The normalcy of it all made Kate fall a little harder for him.

"Hey Castle." She says proud of the fact that her voice wasn't shaking.

"Beckett, come on in. What brings you to Chez Castle?"

"Uh can we talk?"

"Sure, come on in." Castle offers. They sit down in his living room.

"Castle, there's something I need to tell you. Something that I kept from you."

"Wh-what?" Castle asks. He assumes she is going to admit that she heard him profess his love for her.

"I, I'm so sorry I have kept this from you. I just really didn't want this to make the papers or your books or anything. But, Uhm, Castle I have a daughter. She's five and she lives with her dad most of the time. But she spends the summers with me. But we worked out a new custody agreement, with him moving out of the state that I will get full custody with the occasional weekend and holiday visit for him. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner."

She waits for him to say something, anything at all. What surprises her the most is that the man with an endless vocabulary says nothing at all, instead he gets up and slams his office door leaving her sitting there speechless.

She waits in shock for a moment before getting up and leaving his loft heading towards her own apartment. She doesn't know what to do. All she knows is that she just wants to be home.

She makes it home in record time, not quite knowing how to feel she lays down on her couch while looking at old pictures of her daughter. Before she knows it she is softly drifting off to sleep. The weight of this week finally taking its toll.


	2. A prayer in spring

He halted in the wind, and - what was that Far in the maples, pale, but not a ghost? He stood there bringing March against his thought, And yet too ready to believe the most.  
"Oh, that's the Paradise-in-bloom," I said; And truly it was fair enough for flowers had we but in us to assume in march Such white luxuriance of May for ours.  
We stood a moment so in a strange world, Myself as one his own pretense deceives; And then I said the truth (and we moved on). A young beech clinging to its last year's leaves.

Robert Frost

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Author's Note:Enjoy this chapter! Let me know what you think! Once again I do not own Castle nor it's characters.

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If there is one thing that Kate Beckett prides herself on it's the fact that she can detach her emotions while at work. She can leave all of her personal feelings out of the precinct and stay professional at work.

Yea she can compartmentalize, that is unless her world is falling around her crumbling to the ground rapidly.

Sure, she has the best poker face in the world but that doesn't mean things don't affect her. So by noon when Castle still hasn't shown up even though there is just paperwork she begins to feel hurt. She can feel the boys watching her throughout the day attempting to figure out where Castle was. She didn't let anything show. She merely just informed them that Castle wouldn't be in today, and that everything was fine.

But by one, oh by one, the boys knew something was wrong. Castle came sauntering out of the elevator with a ditzy blonde on his arm. If that wasn't enough to send up the red flags when Castle approached them all they smelled was whiskey on him.

"Castle!" Beckett exclaims as he almost falls over. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Well my dear Detective I am living life to the fullest." He replies with slightly slurred words.

Castle sways slightly causing the blonde to giggle incessantly, Esposito and Ryan rush over to help Beckett keep him up right. They sit him down in his usual chair.

In between giggles the blonde manages to make a complete fool out of herself, "Ricky here wanted to show me the big bad cop place! After I gave him a little favor of course." She says with a wink. "He says I'm much better than that Nikki Heat."

Beckett's face turned a new shade of red due to a mix of embarrassment and anger.

Ryan and Espo stood up quickly ushering the blonde into the arms of a cop demanding that they escort her out of the building as soon as possible.

They returned to where Castle and Beckett were. By then Castle was giving her a hell of a lot of trouble.

"Hey guys!" he slurred, "Did you know Beckett was a lying liar from liarsville?" he sing songed.

The boys exchanged a look before turning back to Castle with blank faces on not letting his drunk form get to them.

"Come on Castle, let's get you out of here before you do anything to embarrass yourself further." Beckett offers.

A random cop moves out of the way of the entourage but Castle still attempts to talk to him, "Did Beckett lie to you too? I bet she just lied to everyone!" he yells at the top of his lungs.

"Ok time to go." Kate says rather quickly, but not quick enough.

Captain Gates steps out of her office, "Detective what in the hell is going on here?"

"Uh well you see Sir, Castle here showed up drunk today."

"Get him out of here, then I want to see you in my office Detective!" she says sternly before turning on her heel and closing her office doors.

They escort the very drunk Castle out of the precinct just as he was throws up all over the steps. They set him down on the top step as he heaves over the side.

Beckett runs a hand through her hair. Castle looks up and even after throwing up he is still profusely drunk but not quite as obnoxious, in a soft voice he asks, "did they know Kate? Does everyone but me know?"

"Know what Castle?"

"About your daughter? About you remembering everything from the day you were shot? About everything in general? I'm just the last to know on everything."

"Castle, " Beckett begins.

"Kate don't, " Esposito begins softly, "He's not going to remember anyway. Go deal with Gates we have him."

"Thank you." She responds softly before heading back inside. She slowly made her way back to the elevator. As she walks across the linoleum, her heels clicking as she goes, the security guard gives her a sympathetic look. God she hated that look.

The elevator climbs slowly, almost as if it wasn't moving. Maybe she was slowly coming back down to earth after all that excitement. Maybe it's because she feels like she is walking towards her death. The possibilities are endless.

She approaches Gates' office and knocks swiftly once before being beckoned in. Gates points to the seat across from herself. Beckett sits hesitantly.

Surprisingly Gates starts off quietly, "Detective, Kate, I think it's best if you got out of town for a little while."

"Wait what? Are you firing me?"

"Kate, relax. I'm not firing you. I need you to hear me out. I know this is hard on you and I know what it's like to be in your position, hell I've been in your position."

"I'm sorry sir but with all due respect I don't think you have."

"That's where you're wrong Kate. A few years back I lied to my partner. Told him I hadn't fallen in love with him when he had confessed his love for me. He overheard me telling my best friend that I was in fact in love with him I just couldn't deal with the emotional baggage that he came with. We fought tooth and nail before he tarnished my reputation. That's when I transferred to IA. So I do understand sort of what you're going through Kate."

"I-I'm sorry sir."

"Don't be it was a long time ago. But, Kate, you need to understand someone leaked a story about you two into the papers. It goes on to say how you supposedly broke his heart. I don't think you want to be around when that story rolls in."

"Who would leak such a thing?" Kate asks quietly.

"Apparently Castle himself. I don't know how much I would believe that though. Also, I received the letters about the custody of your daughter. I know how much she means to you and there is someone who understands what it is like to be a mother in law enforcement. One FBI Agent Jordan Shaw. She has offered you a job. Good pay, good hours, and anything you can need. I know it's closer to your ex that way you don't have to worry about the whole different states thing when he moves" Gates pauses a moment for it to sink in for Kate before continuing, " I think you should take it Kate. Get away from the city for a while. It would be good for you. There is always a spot open for you here whenever you need it. But Kate, I would consider this offer."

"Thank you sir. I-I just thank you for understanding."

"Anytime Detective, now why don't you head home for the day. I'm giving Detectives Ryan and Esposito the day off as well."

"Of course, thank you sir."

"Anytime Detective, anytime."


	3. Chapter 3

Kate walked to her desk, her head held high as she grabbed her bag and walked out of the precinct. She really just needed to get away.

So she headed to the one person who can calm her down, her daughter. She drives the twenty minutes to her daughter's elementary school. She parks her car and waits in the cool air conditioning until school is let out. She had called her ex and let him know that she would pick up their daughter. He had agreed needing no explanation. Happy to let mother and daughter have their time together.

As the bell rings she steps out of her car and walks to where the other parents are standing waiting for their kindergarteners as well. She spots her daughter immediately.

Her daughter was all smiles and bubbles as she practically skipped out of school with her friends. Her daughter looks around until she spots her mom. "Mommy!" she yells before running over and latching onto Kate's legs.

"Hi princess, how are you?"

"I'm good. Miss Kit says I is an artist!"

"Really, well you just have to show me some of your art later. How about lunch Josie?"

"Josie likes lunch!" Josie exclaims talking about herself in the third person.

Kate grabs her daughter's hand before leading her to the car. "where's daddy?"

Josie asks. "He's at work right now princess."

"Ok." Josie replies simply before starring out the window at all the passing cars with child like wonder.

They head toward their favorite restaurant that makes the best grilled cheese-Josie's favorite food.

They are seated at their usual table near the back of the restaurant. Kate fixes Josie's pigtail as her curly hair breaks free.

"Josie, princess, I need to talk to you about something really important."

"What mommy?"

"Well, princess what do you think about moving?"

"Moving?"

"Yes sweetie, moving. Your daddy and I both got jobs in California."

"Cal-califur-califurnuh" Josie attempts to pronunciate.

"California princess, what do you think about that?"

"Where the beaches are?"

"Yes, where the beaches are."

"I like it!" Josie exclaims.

Kate laughs along with Josie's excitement. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad. Maybe this could all work out for the best.

As they were finishing up their meals Kate's phone rang, "Hello?" she answers.

On the other line is her ex, Ryan. "hey Kate, do you mind keeping Josie for the night? We have a case but our suspect is all the way in Jersey."

"No problem Ryan. We can talk later about California also." After saying their pleasantries they hang up. Surprisingly enough Kate and Ryan had ended on good terms.

"Looks like you're going to be staying with me tonight princess."

"Yay!" Josie yells while throwing her arms out almost knocking over her drink which throws her into a giggle fit.

"Come on silly, lets head home. I bet there is a Disney movie waiting for us to watch."

"Can we watch the little mermaid? Please please?" Josie asks bouncing from foot to foot excitedly. Kate really couldn't say no to that face so she agrees.

They head back to Kate's apartment and she shoos Josie off to change into her pjs.

When Josie comes back out into the living room she huffs dramatically, "Mommy!" she drags out, "It's movie afternoon that means pjs!"

Kate laughs as Josie tugs at her arm. "Ok, ok princess. Pjs it is." After changing into a pair of shorts and a t-shirt Kate scoops Josie up into her arms. For a little girl of 5 she really is super small, just like Kate had been at her age.

Kate gently drops Josie onto the couch. "Josie, you're getting to big for me to carry you. I'm just so tired!" Kate fake yawns before gently laying down half on Josie half on the couch. Kate pretends to fall asleep.

Josie begins to giggle, "Mommy! Get off me!" she says in between laughs. Josie begins to squirm.

Kate opens her eyes, "Oh no little princess, you just woke up the tickle monster." Kate turns on Josie and begins to giggle before Josie takes off running.

"You can't catch me now!" Josie yells.

Kate chases after her laughing all the way. She really did just need an afternoon with her daughter.

After ending the tickle war Kate lays down on the couch with Josie climbing up behind her.

Kate settles the blankets before Josie climbs into her favorite spot. The nook between the cushions on the back of the couch and her mom's legs. Nestled in there she lays her head on her mom's stomach as Kate begins to stroke her hair. Soon after the movie started Josie began to dose off and before she knew it Kate was beginning to fall asleep too.

So Kate slowly got up and picked up Josie. She carries her toward her room and places Josie in her bed before silently closing the door behind her and walking toward her own room.

Before settling down for the night Kate pulls out her phone ignoring the missed calls and heads straight for a number she hasn't used in a while.

"Agent Shaw," Kate says and pauses after hearing the reply, "Of course Jordan, I would like to take you up on the job offer. I think it's time to move on and start anew in California."


	4. Chapter 4

By the end of the week Josie and Kate were ready to move all the way across the country. All of their stuff was being driven across country in a moving truck but Josie and Kate decided to fly to California.

They got unlucky with the flight times, the only flight leaving the airport that cold Friday morning was at 6 am, that meant they had to be there at 4 in the freakin morning. Ok, so Kate wasn't a total morning person but she could handle it after years of body drops at the most unwanted times. But Josie, oh Josie was definitely not a morning person.

Kate made sure she set her alarm clock 15 minutes earlier than she would have to wake Josie. At the sound of that god forsaken alarm clock she trudged along the cold floor to the bathroom. After a quick shower she wrapped herself up in one of the ridiculously plush hotel towels. Her and Josie were staying in a hotel the last night in the big apple since all of their stuff was already on its way to California.

As noiselessly as possible she made her way to the main room of the hotel and turned on the coffee machine, she relished the slow and steady dripping the coffee made as it fell so effortlessly into the white mug. With the steaming mug in hand, she made her way towards the sleeping form of her daughter who was sprawled out on the pull out couch.

She knelt down next to her and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead before shaking her gently. "Jo, Jo princess you have to get up." She says softly. She receives a half hearted moan in return.

Kate chuckles as her daughter attempts to bury herself further into the pillows. "Come on Josie, time to get up." With that final statement she flicked on the lamp on the table and pulled the covers away from her daughter.

"no mommy!" Josie moans upon feeling the cool air against her small frame.

"Yes, Josie. Time to get up. We have a flight to catch."

This statement perks Josie up, "A plane! Oh mommy we have to go to the plane!"

"Yes, sweetie. We have to go to the plane so you have to hurry up and let mommy do your hair." Josie nods her head enthusiastically. Josie had never been on a plane and after all the stories she had heard she was a little over excited to be flying on one.

Kate changed Josie into a pair of jean shorts and a simple blue ruffled tank. "Mommy hurry we need to get to the plane!" Josie yells from her seat at the table where she eats a muffin.

"Josie we still have time. Mommy needs to get dressed now."

"Mommy we're going to be late."

"Josie sweetie, look at the clock. You see when the big hand touches the 6 it will be 3:30 and that's when we have to leave to get to the airport." Josie looks at the watch intently for a minute before turning her gaze toward her mother, with a serious face on Josie nods.

"Ok, mommy I will watch for the 6," Josie says with such determination that it makes Kate smile.

Kate heads back to her suitcase and pulls out her outfit. Quickly changing and putting her bags by the door. Kate runs a hand through her barely tamed hair while looking around frantically. As her eyes run over everything piled by the door she notices only one thing is missing, "Jo! Come on"

Josie comes barreling toward Kate wrapping her small arms around Kate's legs. With a look full of childlike wonder Josie exclaims, "Mommy we are going to go on the plane now!"

Kate laughs before turning around and grabbing Josie's backpack. She helps Josie put it on than turns around and grabs her own bags.

With her daughter's tiny hand in her own they made their way to the taxi waiting for them outside. They pile their suitcases into the trunk before shuffling into the backseat. Josie squirms into her mother's side.

Kate absent mindedly runs her fingers through Josie's hair as she stares out the window. The city rushing by. The ever moving city moved on around her as Kate was stilled by emotions hitting her like a ton of bricks. She was leaving her city. Her home and family. She looks down at Josie who looks as content as can be. Deep inside she wants to just keep her daughter to herself but Kate knows that the little girl also needs her father. In the end she knows she has to go to California to keep their little broken family together. It's for the best. Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same, and that is exactly why she is doing this. Kate is leaving everything she knows so she can keep her little girl with her father. But god does it hurt.

Josie squirms beside her before resting her head in Kate's lap. Two green eyes stare up at her, "I love you mommy." The little girl says before her eyes drift shut. At that moment nothing else matter she knows she made the right choice moving to California. She had her daughter and that's all that matters.


End file.
